I Studied the Fast-Talking Style of Gilmore Girls Way Too Closely & Here’s What I Found…

When a dude in his forties brings up a show about teenage girls, you know things are gonna get weird.

Today will be no different.

Because today you’ll see a down-n-dirty voice breakdown of Gilmore Girls.

This is a micro-glimpse into the Brand Ventriloquist™ process I use to create voice guides and how I wrote for 329+ entrepreneurs and dozens of brands. (If you’re a writer, you may be able to snag an idea or two to help you stay on style.)

OK, back to the show.

Yeah, I know…

Gilmore Girls is a show decidedly not meant for me.

And I should never use the phrase “down-n-dirty” when talking about teenage girls, but…

The dialogue of this show is genius and the writing is redonkulously tight.

So much so that the average script length (we’re talking total number of pages here) is DOUBLE the length of other one-hour shows. Yet it still fits for time.

How?

Because of its rapid-fire pace.

Crazy short sentences. Ultra-fast talking.

And even though the average sentence length in the dialogue is infinitesimal, I wanna show you how a voice breakdown STILL applies perfectly.

For those who don’t know, Gilmore Girls was about a single-mom (Lorelai) raising her teenage daughter (Rory), while her well-off parents (Richard & Emily) harrumph in the background.

Now, demographics be damned, I liked this show. More on that in a minute, but first, here’s the scene we’re gonna dissect — the family dinner.

First, I’ll show you the script, then you’ll see how the language defines each character.

(Quick character recap: Lorelai = mom, Rory= teenage daughter, Richard = rich grandpa, Emily = rich grandma)

Right, here’s the scene:

EMILY: Rory, how do you like the lamb?

RORY: It’s good.

EMILY: Too dry?

RORY: No, it’s perfect.

LORELAI: Potatoes could use a little salt, though.

EMILY: Excuse me?

RORY: So, Grandpa, how’s the insurance biz?

RICHARD: Oh, people die, we pay. People crash cars, we pay. People lose a foot, we pay.

LORELAI: Well, at least you have your new slogan.

RICHARD: And how are things at the motel?

LORELAI: The inn? They’re great.

EMILY: Lorelai’s the executive manager now. Isn’t that wonderful?

RICHARD: Speaking of which, Christopher called yesterday.

LORELAI: Speaking of which? How is that a speaking of which?

RICHARD: He’s doing very well in California. His Internet start-up goes public next month. This could mean big things for him. [to Rory] Very talented man, your father.

LORELAI: She knows.

RICHARD: He always was a smart one, that boy. [to Rory] You must take after him.

LORELAI: Speaking of which, I’m gonna get a Coke. Or a knife.

Simple, right?

There’s nothing special about these lines.

But still, let’s see how the math plays out.

Here’s a sentence-by-sentence breakdown by character.

Emily first:

Notice how there are almost no commas? Each idea is its own line. And they’re all questions — which shows her passive aggressive finishing move of planting seeds of disapproval in your head until you do exactly as she wants.

(Note: Passive aggressive questioning is more noticeable in spoken word than in written. It’s not something you need to be too concerned about in copy.)

Classic mom.

She’s like a therapist you ask about your crazy dream — that one about the baby badger and the Pogo stick — and they reply…

“Well, what do you think it means?”

…Aaaand now you need more sessions.

Emily is all about tone.

And disapproving side-eyes This GIF makes me sit up straight.

Here’s Richard:

Notice the final positioning of “your father” and “that boy.” His unique sentence structure makes the dialogue interesting — like an Yale-educated Yoda. He’s deliberate with his words and his style shows he’s a man of intention. When he talks, you listen.

But also note his abrupt transition. It shows he’s going to say what he wants to say no matter what, yet he makes it seem polite.

(Writers beware: If you ever write an email where the connection to your point is a stretch, the transition is as jarring as it is here.)

Now look closely…

Even though his sentences are still short, they average twice the length of Emily’s.

Did you catch that?

Longer words too. (Brand Voice Academy students might recognize those cadence and vocabulary characteristics from the “Voice of God” avatar.)

(I mean, if Richard says it…)

Let’s do Lorelai:

Notice the repetition of “speaking of which.” It’s said three times and it’s a parrot of Richard’s line. She’s mirroring him to mock him. Plus, things are funnier in threes. (The exception being The Godfather trilogy. And pinky toes.)

You can see how Lorelai falls right between her parents. Two questions asked, and her sentences range the exact length of Emily’s shortest (3) and Richard’s longest (8).

I’m sure the writers didn’t plan that, but it’s crazy how it happens naturally, right?

Ain’t math great?

(Aww, YOU’RE beyond great, Lorelai.)

OK, now Rory:

Short and sweet. Rory’s best lines come in answers to questions. She doesn’t have much to do in this scene other than move along the dialogue — which would be typical of most teenagers in a dinner situation.

Not a lot to dissect here. If this were the Gilmore Boys, Rory’s character would probably just grunt and chew.

If she were bowling, her eye-roll would knock down every pin in the alley

Now, yes… This dialogue is insanely short.

The overall average length of everyone’s sentences is only five words.

But…

Using five as your baseline?

You can define everyone’s character styles.

Even if the cadence is rapid-fire, the sentence length still defines the brand voice of each character.

You don’t need a lot of lines to illustrate voice. Little things like buttons, microcopy, and captions go a long way toward influencing how your reader perceives your brand. By shrinking or stretching them, you assign key characteristics to your persona.

And here’s where it gets interesting…

Google says Amy Sherman-Palladino (the writer) is the daughter of a comedian — which makes perfect sense! The goal of most comics is to get to the punchline as fast as possible. The more laughs per minute, the better the act. Fewer words = more jokes. That’s exactly what the fast-talking does here…

Even though it’s not a comedy.

It’s also interesting how the directors adjusted shots to accommodate the writing style. They filmed at wider angles to eliminate all the fast cuts. The cadence affected everything.

And yeah, I know I get carried away with these analyses, but this word nerd stuff is kinda my thing.

Teenage girls are mean

And if you need proof?

Just ask my daughter… Lorelei.

Want to learn more about voice breakdown and ridiculously detailed copy analysis? Here are two ways I can help:

1. Have your brand voice analyzed and documented. If you’d like a handy-dandy document so your writers can deliver perfect copy without you having to edit it for hours, ask me about your very own Brand Ventriloquist™ Voice Guide. They make life easy.
2. Learn voice voodoo (for writers). Brand Voice Academy Workshops are a highly specialized programs that go DEEP on voice analysis. They train you to capture any client’s style, craft new offers, and package voice guides to present to brands.